My Comprehensive Visual Inspection and Emissions Test were passed with flying colors - but my Functional Check is still failing.

I have two monitors that are not available on the OBDii check - Catalytic and Oxygen.
Smog person told me to drive more - i've added 350 more miles to my care going highway / streets / traffic / open road and still haven't been able to trigger the monitor results in either missing monitor self-tests.
Escalated to my mechanic who said he is perplexed, but gave me a number to a CA DMV Referee.
They looked at it - can't give me an exemption on this monitor stuff and told me I have to see a dealer!!!

HAS ANYONE experienced this? I am now two weeks past my reg. date - so I'm driving around an unregistered car and don't want to rack up a bunch of fix it tickets I may never be able to fix! This is driving me crazy, i've wasted so much extra time, which I don't have, driving around aimlessly and waking up early to get smog retests and such.

Please let me know if the dealer can even help or if my Mercedes is now worthless in the state of California...